This time, This place
Misused, Mistakes
Too long, Too late
Who was I to make you wait
Just one chance
Just one breath
Just in case there's just one left
'Cause you know,

That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you'll be with me
and you'll never go
Stop breathing if
I don't see you anymore

I wanted
I wanted you to stay
'Cause I needed
I need to hear you say
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I forgive you
For being away for far too long
So keep breathing
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore

~"Far Away" by Nickleback

Mommy Can't No Satisfaction

This whole being a single mom and trying to date and have a somewhat normal relationship with the male species has got to be one of the most difficult stunts to pull off. You have to spend "quality" time with your kids that's a given. Your man requires intimacy and time spent with you as well. It starts to become a conflict of schedules when your trying to accomplish everything and still maintain your sanity. Then something else comes into play, for me anyway. I've started to want more from Mr.7. physically (I think you know what I mean). That every other weekend and maybe once or twice during the week just isn't cutting it. Call me crazy, but I have no problem being a "booty-call" once in awhile. I know we care about each other, so I don't think of it in a bad way. I mean how many wife's do you know that give a "courtesy --" to their husbands once in awhile. I know way to many and the ones who don't surely arn't playing their cards right. I'm really struggling with this overwhelming desires to be with him more often. I'm contemplating excuses to get out of the house and take a hour visit to see him
Any suggestions on how to make this crazy life of mine work and keep every one "satisfied" ? xoxo~Cupcake

Frustrated

Just when you think things are going great life throws you a curve ball and you realize that what you thought was great someone else felt was mediocre. That is what I got smacked with this morning. It really is annoying when asking a question gets turned around as snooping or being nosey. When in fact, its was only a question. Why do men get defensive when you ask them something ? I'm not jealous. I could care less about him going out with friends or whatever, but it always seems like I am invading their privacy.
Without communication, It becomes difficult to remain open and honest with your partner. I don't want to feel like I cant say whats on my mind or ask whats on his. I'm starting to think that his irritation with simple questions is a way for him to keep his distance. Hope that's not the case, but I know I'm getting very frustrated.

Hello. How have you been ? We haven't chatted lately. I guess when life is stable, I don't feel as strong a need to blog. Things are fairly smooth at this moment. Keeping busy being a single mom and dealing with issues that all moms have (single or not). Working full-time, being a taxi-cab for the kids, a chef, a housekeeper and sometimes a therapist. I also try to fit in time for my own personal/love life, if that is possible.
Still on the up with "Mr. 7". Its been close to 3 months and I do believe the honeymoon is over, but that's okay. Here comes reality. This is who I am. This is who you are. Take it or leave it. This relationship has made me grow as a person. I don't ALWAYS get my way with him. He doesn't give in easily. Very strong character that "Mr. 7". Something this cupcake isn't use too. But exactly what I need. We are pass the "its all about the sex". Actually, in my opinion, we could increase the frequency of that just a bit. Kinda different coming from the women instead of the man that I don't get enough. At least I don't feel like that's ALL it is. Just physical. Its NOT. Somewhere between the last entry and now, I pause when I write this, but think I may be falling in "you know what" with him. ~~~~Oh no !
We are having our first weekend together. Yeah, we have gone away, but always with other couples and friends. I think this will give me an idea of where his heart is. We don't talk about what "our" plans are for "us". Just enjoying the ride for now. But as you know, I am a control freak and like to know what the other person is thinking, feeling. "Mr. 7" knows this and I think he withholds information to keep me on my toes.
I like how this feels. Don't have any complaints. Starting to get that feeling of always wanting him to be part of my life. I don't want to be without him. He brings out the best in me. Isn't that reason enough to want someone in your life ? I think it is.
xoxo~ Cupcake

Its a Bunch of Hullabaloo

Hullabaloo. Crazy, Stupid, Confusion. A loud noise or uproar.
That describes my current mental state at this time to a tee. Mr. 7decided last night, after I couldnt meet him for dinner he informed that he was going to dinner with a "persistent and respectful" girl. What the hell does that mean ?
Well, obviously, we are really gonna need to talk. No way does this girl play 2nd fiddle to anyone.
You would think at this time in my life that the men are date would no longer act like boys. Once again, I was proven wrong.

Can You Really Meet A Good Guy On A Blind Date ? Yes You Can.

My friend at work set me up with a longtime friend of her husbands. I thought, why not? No expectations. No history. If anything, a new friend. By the way, my sister did marry her husband through a blind date. So there is always a ray of hope.
Anyway, we went to dinner on a Thursday night (not ruining my weekend for this new guy who probably isn't worth a Saturday or Sunday date). Seemed nice. All 4 of us went to a bar/restaurant. Had good conversation. Nothing too amazing. Definetly not head over heels for him. But nice.
After dinner, went back to friends house. I told her I wasn't coming in. I wasn't really feelin the vibe with him.
Just went home. Didn't have much to go on, but he didn't ask for my number. That was wierd. But the next morning he emailed me. And we chatted back and forth and I soon realized that he was Hot for me. And too my shock, I was hot for him as well.
So, its been 4 weeks now and we have seen each other 3-4 times a week. He is learning about all my imperfections and breaking down the walls that only a few have been able to do in the past. Let's hope I can keep this one around. ;o}

It's Okay for Girls to Like Football

Its Sunday. Which means Football. At least a few months out of the year. Growing up in a home with 3 brothers and being a cheerleader for who knows how many years, I learned to love football. Don't get me wrong, when I was younger, I hated it. But as matured into a women, I realized that watching grown men in booty-hugging pants running across your TV screen isn't that bad. As I learned more about the game, I started to understand how it all worked. Fortunately for me, I have 3 close girlfriends that also love to partake in the football experience. So the 4 of us pick a sports bar on Sundays and go hang out. We have a few favorites, but as with anything, we like to change it up now and then to keep things spicy.

One thing I find particularly funny is how men look at the 4 of us and in amazement say "I don't know any girls who like football, why do you?" That's usually when I roll my eyes at them and say nothing. Do they think that only a man could understand this game ? Seriously ? Or is that suppose to be their pick-up line ? If so, I'm not buying it.

Anyway, I am going to watch football with the girls and one of my "boys". We will call him "Mr. Football" to keep his identity in the vault. He is a bit older than me, but super sweet. We have know each other for 7 years or more. We make-out now and then, but nothing serious. Why you ask ? Not sure. He travels a lot due to work. He played pro football in the past and I always assumed that he was a just that, a "Player". Never allowed myself to get emotionally attached to him. If he needs a date to a dinner or I need someone to escort me to a party, we call each other up. His only daughter knows my daughter and they know that we hang out once in awhile. Actually, if my daughter had it her way, I would be dating him. She thinks he's cool. Whatever.

It should be fun. I always love seeing my friends. And this will help get my mind off "Music Man". Just to let you know he still hasn't called or texted. How rude. This is hard to say, but I guess he's just not that into me.